In honor of my 30th bday… let me tell you all about my regrets!!!!! Hah! Jk! But honestly, I just started a majority of these things within the last few years and some I started as recent as last month and I totally wish I did them sooner:
1. Wake Up Early. It’s not a secret that all the successful people start their day super early. AND I TOTALLY GET IT. I started doing The Miracle Morning and I’ve never been more productive. It’s like a domino effect – if you’re *that* productive in the morning you continue that momentum for the rest of the day. Its awesome.
2. Wear SPF. In my teens I was totally guilty of sitting outside in the sun with baby oil getting burnt to a crisp and feeling totally satisfied when my burn faded into a tan. 😖 But then in my 20s some friends started getting weird moles removed and other biopsies done… and then it hit me - is being tan worth almost dying of skin cancer? Nah brah.
3. Embrace my cultural clash. Why can’t I make my husband a plate first AND be a feminist? Why can’t I love Jesus AND be an ally for the LGBTQ community? Is it possible to be liberal and a supportive military spouse? Can I be a present, loving, understanding, Asian-tiger mom? I always had this internal battle with my upbringing and my current values and instead of trying to be one or the other I just learned to love both!
4. Stop caring what others thought. “wHaT wOuLd otHEr pEOplE tHInK?!” that question has stopped me from doing like 70% of what I really wanted to do. It’s funny how 5 simple words have so much power over a person.
5. Did stuff with my kids. As a mother I do a lot of things for my kids. Take them on a walk because they need some sunlight. Go to the park because they need to run off energy. I did a lot for them but never with them. Then motherhood became a chore. After a change in my perspective, things became less of an undertaking and motherhood became so fun!
6. See a therapist. We started seeing a therapist for my oldest son. Even though he is the one going to therapy everything was affected and changed for the better — our outlook on life, our parenting dynamic, and it allowed us to reflect on our daily life to make the changes on things that were no longer serving our family.
7. Hang with my parents more. Moving to a different country has made me miss my mom and dad and my in-laws SO MUCH. I definitely took advantage of living so close to them. All the little things that annoyed me growing up had become little quirks that I missed. 🥰
8. Read the Bible. I wish I did this earlier because I found comfort and strength in the stories when I least expected it AND when I needed it the most.
9. Work out for the energy. I used to work out for a sick bod. I used to work out for the aesthetic. Now I work out because it makes me feel good and it helps me keep up with the three crazies. Will I ever have a perfectly coke bottle shaped body ever again? Probably not. Am I heart broken about it? Nah.
10. Stop trying to fit a societal mold. I wasted so much time and energy trying to be the quintessential ____ that I began to resent my role as a ______ because I was trying so hard to be someone that I definitely wasn’t that I started hating my role as a _______. The best teacher, the best daughter, the best sister, wife, business woman, blogger, mother... whatever the label was!
11. Keep in touch with old friends. Actually text them not just “like” a pic on IG. I love keeping in touch w old friends, seeing their life, cheering them on from a far, and then catching up with them like it hasn’t been YEARS since we physically saw each other.
12. Read self help books. For real – soooo good! There is always something in yourself that you can improve on!
13. Care about the planet. I stopped single-use plastic in April and I haven’t looked back. Traveling around South East Asia has really opened my eyes to see how much trash humans actually produce. Looking out the window when we’re visiting these countries and seeing literal garbage in the waterways and gross murky water is totally sobering. After cutting out single-use plastic it kind of became an addiction/game like: how else can I reduce my carbon footprint? What else can I do to help the planet?
14. Travel. 🗺 I thought that because I had small kids we couldn't travel. But here we are toting three young kids around and experiencing other cultures with them. Seeing cool stuff with them. Eating delicious food with them. Just because you have kids doesn't mean life stops. I'm not saying you need to book a plane ticket to the other side of the world, traveling domestically is just as good. You can see so much if you just travel 5 hours outside of your city/town.
15. Stretch. Trying to touch my toes when I was 20 was A LOT easier and a lot less noisy. Making it a point to stretch or do yoga has saved myself from hurting if I slept funny or if I was playing crazy with the kids.
16. Think before speaking. If you know me IRL you’ll understand how much trouble and how many feelings I hurt due to my lack of filter. 😅😖I cringe thinking of past conversations where I think I’m being respectful but I’m actually asking some triggering questions. At first, it was hard to slow down and think when you’re talking to someone. It got to the point where I was super quiet at social functions. But now that I’ve become more self aware, thinking back on conversations don’t make me wanna smack myself anymore.
17. Establish a good skin routine. I want wrinkles and laugh lines. I want my skin to glow. I also don’t want to pay for Botox, so....
18. Respect my body. Do I love my body? Heck yes. Do I like my body? Not all the time. Do I nitpick, poke, prod, grab, and point out all my flaws? Absolutely. Am I trying to be better about it. Yes. My body and I have been through it — child birth, clumsiness, tattoos, sickness, adventure. It’s not fair that I’m always nitpicking at her when all that she’s done is allow me to be healthy so I can live my best life ever and give me three beautiful babies. Not fair at all — it’s not going to happen magically overnight but I am going to do better.
19. Took personality tests. I swear -- Enneagram, birth order, and reading self-help books has helped me figure out so much about myself. Some people think personality tests are a bunch of hooey, but I’m a big fan of them because they let me play to my strengths and work on my weaknesses. They allow me to be like “omg that’s so me!” and fix whatever needs to be fixed!
20. Forgive more. Having a good memory is both a blessing and a curse. In my teens and early 20s if you crossed me or my friends or family, you were done. I cut you out of my life faster than that sword cut Mulans hair. Then I held on to all that anger for a long time. What was the point? Literally no point. What did I get out of it? Nothing. Other than tension headaches and tight shoulders.
21-30..... So I’m 10 short. Which is guess is a good thing because it means I did all the things I wanted to do before I was 30, right? 🤷🏻♀️
My 20s were incredible. They were jam-packed more life experience into those 10 years than I could ever ask for and for that I am thankful. I really don’t know how I’m going to top my 30s… I just know I’m going to. Cheers to a new era.